If you want to bring something new and some good change to the relationship with your horse you need to TAKE CARE OF YOURSELF, first.
To be the source of the positive change you need to be positively changed, first. My advice for you is very simple. Really and deeply take care of yourself.
You can bring to your relationship with your horse only these things that you have. If you are in some situation with your horse today and you want this situation to evolve into something better that means that YOU HAVE TO EVOLVE INTO SOMETHING BETTER first. That means that you have to change first and your horse will change immediately in response to the changes that has happened in you.
This is the wonderful gift that we receiving from our horses, that they are telling us honestly and truly who we really are. If you are attending another seminar and come back to your horse and see that nothing has changed that means that YOU HAVEN’T CHANGED. This is so simple and so true and so few people really understand it.
My advice is very simple:
STOP THINKING ABOUT YOUR HORSE how you want him to change, how it would be wonderful when he would be different..more calm, more polite…more energetic – this will never happen as long as your horse will be with you and you won’t change.
On the other hand, if you can change yourself even a little bit today and you will come back to your horse you will see this change immediately. Your horse will be literally a different horse. I’ve seen this so many times and people are very amazed when they see it and they can’t believe that this can be true.
So what you can do in terms of practical decisions: it is very easy and we all love it – you can really and deeply take care of yourself. Eat better food that makes you feel light and happy, go to the swimming pool and spend some time swimming enjoying the wonderful state of being suspended in the water. Sleep well. Never go to your horse when you are stressed, when you need sleep, when you are tired, hungry or angry or sad. There is no point.
Just think for a moment what YOU and YOUR BODY really needs now.
And simply do this.
Come tomorrow to your horse when you are happy and you are relaxed, calm, after a wonderful meal and watch how your horse will adapt to this NW YOU and a NEW SITUATION.
It is so easy and yet so few people understand this simple truth. You really don’t need another magical technique about doing something with your horses. You really don’t need set of advices how you can do this or that to improve or calm your horse. This will never work unless you REALLY CHANGE YOURSELF FIRTS.
During the day you have some amount of the energy and it will be the most valuable for you if you will spend this energy for your own good sake. Never hurry yourself, give yourself time to seat, relax, watch Nature look into the sky. This will change you.
I know so many people that are coming day after day to the stable and they are working and working with their horses hour after hour and nothing really changes. The horses are staying the same because in this relationship HORSE CANNOT INITIATE the CHANGE. It’s the human responsibility.
And to change something you have to change yourself first.
Why this is so important?
All the time in your life exists something that you can call the TRUE YOU. The True You is the only aspect in your existence that can really connect with your horse. The real connection is based on trust and understanding of each other. There is no place for control, fear, past and future. When you want to awake the true you to connect with your horse and the True You is saying something to your mind this will be something that will really help you. And something that you REALLY, REALLY need at this moment.
When you are sleepy the True You will tell you “Go to sleep”. When you are upset or stressed the True You will tell you “Take a rest, relax”. The True You will give you clues what to do and in what order at this moment.
If you are not ready the True You will not support you in that moment with your horse. You will have to FORCE yourself to be there. And to spend time with your horse. And forcing yourself to do something is coming from the very different source than the True You. That is why it is so important to correctly and thoroughly prepare yourself to spend some time with your horse.
If you feel even slightest resistance in yourself to go to your horse or do something with your horse – simply don’t do it and don’t judge yourself. Do something else. Do something for yourself. Prepare yourself. This resistance tells you that this is not your time to be with your horse and that you need something else at this moment.
The True You is always with you and is always helping you simply because it’s you.
But when you force yourself to do anything, you are closing the communication with the True You and the True You cannot help you. This may sound very esoteric right now, but this also very well-know psychological phenomenon. When you look at your life, for example at your life with your horse, you will see many decisions and actions that you would not take today. If you come back to these moments, you will remember some kind of resistance accompanying these decisions and actions.
To truly understand how it works you have to start to feel it here and now and not think about it in the terms of future outcomes or past experiences.